Got a grant rejected today - which I had guessed was coming, seeing as I submitted it in November, and had seen other ones from that program getting funded on Fastlane. Frustrating, but I really just wanted the reviews at this point. (Which I skimmed, and it seems to be a classic case of Reviewer Number 3...ugh).
What really gets to me is that I wasted so much time waiting for this grant, because I was hoping to approach potential collaborators with money in my pocket. Now, I have to approach six months later than I would have originally, and still with no money and no data. I am PISSED, mostly at myself, and upset in general. I suppose it's good that I got this news on a weekend, so I'm not as upset in lab tomorrow, but.... ugh.
My procrastination habit has got to go. It does nothing but hurt me, and my chances at ever getting a g-d iota of data and graduating and all sorts of shit like that. Dammit.
(Also, it kills me that Advisor says I should reapply next year when I will STILL not have the data the reviewers wanted. Fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck).
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